It's amazing how you're body reacts to different stimuli. Today I'm pretty sore and pretty wiped out. After the race yesterday, I felt like superman. All those endorphins buzzin', hanin' out with Kristen and her dad, drinkin' beers at the finish-Good times! Not so good for recovery, but good times none the less.
Anyway, I'm amazed at the fact that my body can be so beat up from putting forward an effort for only 38 minutes. I've been less sore after running 20 miles, much less the 6.2 I ran yesterday. I'm glad though, because to me this is really a sign of pushing myself harder than I do in training. Obviously in any race, the adreniline is gonna kick in, and your competitive juices are gonna flow. The end result is kickin' ass...or trying to anyway.
This weekend has been pretty good on all fronts. I'm tired from another good week at work, and am looking forward to the next week. I'm really starting to come into a "zone" as far as work is concerned. I think I'm reaching a new level as a personal trainer. I've been able to harness my efforts, and really come away doing something that I love for work. I think it's been the fact that I've been able to make up my mind that personal training is an honorable profession and career.
I've been chasing ideals for so much of my life. I always wanted to be a professional athlete from time I was a little kid. Whether it was baseball, hockey, football, or whatever, my main goal was being paid to do something I love. Unfortunately, I have not been able to accomplish that goal-NOT YET ANYWAY...the senior PGA tour is still a reality.
Some of my friends have been able to accomplish the goal of making a living being an athlete, and for a long time, especially recently, this has really been tough for me to deal with. It's not that I'm not happy for them, I just have felt like failure for not having reached the same level. Sure I've had many athletic successes, but it still just never reached the level I wanted it to.
It's important though, to realize this has been most of my own doing. I made some bad decisions, and often times took myself out of things mentally. It's not that my friends are better athletes than I am, it's just that they were able to put everything together better than I could.
I say all this to bring my writing today to this important point: I finally accept me for me. I am what I am and I have done what I have done. I can't change any of that. My objective, at this point in my life is to be the best at what I'm doing now. That is, be the best personal trainer I can be, the best boyfriend I can be, and the best person I can be.
I've learned that the first true step to success in anything you do is to be happy with you. Otherwise, you run the risk of not being able to truly apply yourself to what is important. If you spend dwelling on what could have been or what you didn't do, you're not going to continue to improve in any direction. You'll stay stagnant for as long as it takes for you to make up your mind to pick yourself up, get in the game, and be the best you can.
This has all been on my mind for a while lately and it's great to get it out. Again, I don't know if anyone is actually reading this blog (and to some extent, it really doesn't matter-I'm getting my head straight and it's working wonders for me), but if you are, I thank you for taking a look inside my head. I hope if you're suffering from something similar, this helps you. Stive to be the best at whatever you do and you'll always be fulfilled. You don't have to be the best, just be the best YOU you can.
Thanks for reading.
Push 'till ya puke...Always.